I just feel so strange. I worked out to total exhaustion this evening, but I don't think that is it.
I keep thinking about everything that has happened in the past two years. Hell, the past one year. It made my heart start racing and not in a good way.
I'm doing well. I really am. But every now and then I'll have a good memory and get sad. Not in a way that I'd ever take zach back now, but that I had some really great moments, special moments, that I'm afraid I won't feel again. I hope I will. And I hope that next time they'll stick. But it's hard to top the first time you're engaged, first home as a family, etc.
I know I'm allowed to get sad sometimes still. I also know that the person he is now isn't who he was and who I was going to marry.

This isn't to say that I don't pray for his happiness and well being every night. Bc I do. I want him to find his peace.


So I'm going to be fine. I'm most of the way there. Everyone has setbacks. But I know that if anything this is all going to help me in the end.
Also. How awesome is this necklace?




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