so i woke up this morning thinking i was having a heart attack. after i woke up enough to realize that my left arm wasnt numb, i put together that it wasnt a heart attack (even though i ate a whole pizza myself in the last two days) but a panic attack. i have not done this in quite some time. once the PIERCING PAIN stopped i made myself get up and shower only to then notice that my left eye is swollen nearly shut. one would think this would have already come to my attention, but no. and it only does this when i've been crying too much, bc i rub my eyes like a 2 year old and it gets all weird and gross and you dont need to hear this, do you. the moral of the story is that i am a mess.
i'm going to the doctor this afternoon and then i am promptly going to the mexican restaurant and ordering a pitcher of margarita flavored tequila. i already know what the doctor is going to say, i just dont want to hear them say it. bc then i'll have to do what they say. and that will be hard.
i couldnt sleep last night, possibly bc i slept all afternoon, and read a book. My Sister's Keeper is depressing. dont read it.
i'm tired of whining and i apologize profusely for it. this is not where i want to be.
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