1. First day of work bid'ness. Can i just say even though i know (I KNOW, OK?) that it's just my first day and all... but i seriously feel awesome about this career move. It wasn't just bc everyone was drunk at the party, even today, everyone was so welcoming and helpful and really put me in the frame of mind that i am going to be important. it wasn't like the last place where they made me feel like they were doing me a favor by hiring/keeping me, but rather it's like... they know i can do the work, they're excited to have me there, and they want to open up every opportunity possible for me. there's extra training and certification i can sign up for, charity events i can be a part of, and well the whole nasa thing kicks ass even though the whole space program just went down the tubes. it is going to be similar work to what i did before, but more on the commercial, public-based knowledge end (vague enough, right?) that i don't feel quite like i'm selling my soul completely.
2. i called the doctor to find out my biopsy results today and they are goodish. the one they were concerned about looks good for now but they want to check it again later and the one they were sorta concerned with but didn't do anything about they want to see later too. so i can put off worrying for another six months. should i still be concerned, sure. am i going to slather sunscreen on like its my job from now on, absolutely. but unless i notice major changes, i can breathe a little easier til.. august.
3. picture this. a shady man comes to my door and tries to sell me steaks and seafood out of the back of his car. i told him i don't eat meat. who is the bigger fraud of this situation?
4. i'm scheduling visits to look at new apartments. i've decided (have i mentioned this? i dont remember) that with all these changes i need to get out of here. and along with every other change i've made lately, i was told it is a damn good idea. it does help hearing from someone else that ideas you've been thinking about...oh...forever, just need to happen to be happy. i think i've made the hardest and yet most beneficial changes already, and anything from here is just building a stronger foundation to fix myself on. but i'm looking at upgrading to a nice place, with more space and light and functionality. an adult space. one with working lights, haha.
5. no but really. as much as i feel lonelyish and weird, this is good. i'd spent too much time like miss havisham, locked up in my own decaying house, obsessing over ways to fix a decaying and useless dream. things i thought i knew, i don't necessarily know so much anymore. and that's scary and weird and and difficult and important. this whole growing thing is hard, kids.
6. to celebrate getting out of bed and going to work and looking at living alternatives, i am going to eat that brie. yes. i reward myself with cheese. i realize this is probably not good for my digestive tract. but, its brieeeee. and delicious.
7. lady gaga and sir elton john kicked ass at the grammy's last night. that is all.
8. love.
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