things

1. did you go outside today? you should have. bc it was beautiful. when i left work i came home, opened all the windows, and took off for awhile. there is a reason sunshine makes things grow. i am one of them.

2. my exercise pants are finally too big, to the point of falling off my butt when i try to run. these are the spandex-y ones with a tie front, and i cant tie the tie any tighter (say that five times fast). i know this is one small victory for my waistline and ass, but hey, i will take it thank you very much.

3. work has been so busy the last few days, but a good busy. i've been working on the project i lead, and the power has gone to my head a little bit. it's kind of a good, but wicked feeling.

4. i thought about sitting down and counting all the books i've read lately so i can update my Goals list, bc i dont remember the last time i counted. but i know in the last two weeks i've read four. all chick lit, mind. but entertaining none the less.

5. i couldnt sleep for shit last night with the weight of the world on my mind. so my plan for this evening is to curl up with the next book in this series and fall asleep whenever i fall asleep.

6. i 'liked' the PetHelpers page on facebook and that has been a huge mistake bc I want to go adopt every dog on there. there is one that is an adult golden retriever/something mix and he looks like such a good dog. i want a big dog so badly. and a yard. someday, i will make that happen.

I read an article about how they did another one of those studies to see which state is the most miserable, and of course WV was numero uno. and i think that's crap. yes there is a lot of poverty and old people here, and those two things take into account the majority of the people they counted for these studies bc they are the only ones home during the day (though obv some of the info can be taken directly from censuses. but reading the article, the hipster hillbilly in me got all fired up. (note: that will be the title of my first bluegrass beat poet album). and i stubbornly want to address some of the points they made. maybe my friends and I aren't the norm for this state, but i think it's important to point out that:

1. there are a lot of us with more than just high school diplomas. there are a lot of us with more than just undergraduate degrees. hell, i consider PhD's, MDs, PharmD's, etc etc etc among close friends. There are smart people in this state, we just had to work extra hard to get the education we deserve.

2. We aren't all on welfare. Pharmacists. Doctors. Teachers. Hygienists. Safety Managers. PR Specialists for Univ departments. Therapeutic Consultants for those with disabilities. Validations Assistant for the Lottery. Engineers. Nurse Practitioners. Accountants. Youth Pastors. Pilots. Cancer Researchers. Government Fucking Contractors in all business sectors including IT, Writing, Management, etc. We busted our hump to get here, and we done good. and bc of this we aren't only not on welfare, but most of us make more than the median household income. So suck on that, Hawaii.

3. We aren't all obese. I'll be the first to admit i AM a bit overweight. But I'm not obese. there's nothing wrong with having some meat on your bones though, it means you appreciate food and dont live your life eating boiled chicken and steamed broccoli. We have gyms. We have awesome nature trails. We have farmer's markets.

4. off the top of my head i can only think of one or two smokers i call close friends. and i think that says something. we aren't sitting around using out foodstamps to buy smokes, instead we're using our hard earned paycheck to buy nerdy electronics (can i just say i want the new ipad without drooling here?)

5. i will concede that we have a good deal of cancer. but hello. a lot of that is genetic, and when hundreds of years worth of generations cant get out of these mountains, what exactly do you think is going to happen? plus when you add in the chemical valley and being downwide from some really bad industrial shit, we are fucked for ways from sunday.

6. 75 years is the average life expectancy. you know what? i'm totally ok with that. i dont want to grow to be 90 and lose my mind and not know anyone i'm related to and think its 2010 again. if i can live a full life by 75, then i'd be more than willing to be taken at that age.

i know i'm not the majority in this state. but i get so sick everyone making us out to be backwoods trash who pop out a new kid every year just to stay on welfare. yes, there ARE a lot of people who do that and i pity them. but there are a hell of a lot of us out there who are also making something of ourselves. and i think my well-being score is much higher than the 62.3 average given to us. Sure, a lot of WVians have depression. and a lot of us are medicated. but you know why we're medicated? bc we realize there's a damn problem that just telling ourselves to 'suck it up' and having another beer wont fix. so we take care of it. and we move the fuck along.


i dropped the eff bomb a lot tonight. but i am proud of my home. i love it and its mountains and its friendly people and its delicious homecooking and its messed up weather. i know i wont always live here, but while i am i'm going to make the most of myself. and i think i've done a pretty damn good job of it too.