obligatory memory post

I feel like everyone is doing their 'ten years ago i was...' speech. and while i feel like that diminishes something about what happened, i feel like maybe it's important for everyone to share that memory bc it helps connect them to other people.

so. ten years ago i was a senior in high school in middle of nowhere WV. I lived in my own little bubble and wasn't about to take off my rose colored glasses. I was sitting in my Physics class, goofing off bc our teacher was in one of his moods where he didn't feel like teaching. (this was a common occurrence, but neither here nor there) someone had to have come in to tell him to turn on the tv bc he didn't often let us watch it, but we sat and watched the news while he played solitaire on the computer. i remember him making some glib remark about the pilot being a drunken idiot to hit a building. when the second one happened though, even he shut up. i remember my journalism teacher next period frantically trying to contact a family member who was supposed to be in the nyc area for business. but i feel like for the most part, we just went about our day. we didn't know really the full impact of what the hell was going on. we were sheltered in the mountains, ignorant to just about everything. i think thats why i still feel so strange about it all, bc it didnt directly effect me so I don't feel like i'm connected in that way to what happened. if i look back over the last ten years i think the only 2 things that came from it that really struck me was when i had to fly and the whole process was a pain in the ass, and my freshman year of college when the dorm took us on a bus trip to nyc and our first stop was the hole in the ground that was the towers. i'm not even kidding when i tell you that i don't remember at all what it looks like. did i block it out of my mind? i guess i did.

i feel like this whole post has made me sound very callous. but those of you who know me know i'm a bleeding freaking heart. i guess now that i'm out of the holler and have more technology and things at my fingertips and can see the photographs and can watch/listen to the recordings, it does all become more eerie and sad. but for me at the time, i guess i was just too sheltered and ignorant.

i do wish many good thoughts and prayers today to those who lost loved ones. that probably doesnt sound like much after that rambling post, but i do honestly mean it.