I suppose on birthday eve I should actually post a blog, huh? I've definitely slacked off on this. It doesn't hold my interest as much. Probably bc I'm not bitching and whining as much (I'm sure you approve of that at least).

I've been doing a lot of thinkin. Since I'm hitting 30 in a few hours. On one hand it doesn't bother me and isn't a big deal. On the other it's overwhelming.

Am I where I thought i would be at 30? No way. Not even close. But. That doesn't mean I don't like where I am. For the most part anyway. There's about two percent of me that's Wishy washy over it all. I figured i would be living out of state, married, at least thinkin about kids, hopefully working in some sort of publishing job. I'm not doing any of those things.

But I don't think Im a failure for it. I think my path has just been changed. Yes I still hope to get married some day and maybe have kids. Sure I'd like to do some sort of publishing. But I do like my job. I like Morgantown mostly. And good things have happened tht I appreciate. And bad things have happened that I learned from and appreciate even more.

When I look back over this past year, it's been a doozy. I mean I started my birthday waking up In a treehouse in the Caribbean! You can't beat that haha. So many things have happened. I bought a car. And then a whole house. I adopted another crazy dog that I can't imagine living without. I have a godson who I love to spoil. I got the most violent case of the flu and got to catch up on daytime TV. I got a promotion at work bc i finally proved myself. I made new friends. Drifted apart from old friends. Vacationed with friends I've known for over 20 years. I got back in the dating scene. Which is terrifying. Has it worked out for me yet, no. But I still have hope that it will. I'm just glad I'm doing it. I've participated in a ton of charity events, doing my small part to better my community. Hell, I learned what happens when you put gasoline in the oil reserve on a lawn mower (rookie move). I learned to mow a yard! I've cried from exhaustion. Laughed til I peed myself. Been angry enough to throw a shoe,
Sorry enough to actually admit I was wrong and apologize. I've come to love my family more than I thought possible for helping me through a lot of things.

So many things I am thankful for. I am very blessed. And these things are what keep me from being too sad over turning 30. I've got a lot of life and experiences ahead of me. I just hope that I'm brave enough to face them.

Thank you all for being here with me through the ups and downs. I appreciate all of you.

Here is how I'm spending my birthday eve: curled up with my dogs, watching Must Love Dogs, eating cheese popcorn, with a pile of blankets and the windows open. Not where I thought I would be. But. I'll take it.



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